Touchdowns and Dropped Passes

Dear Stevie Johnson,

I am really sorry that you took your eyes off the ball and dropped the winning touchdown pass when you were wide open in the end zone yesterday. I know that you praise me 24/7 and I am grateful for that. But please know that I have much more important things to do—like making sure the world keeps going in spite of human frailty, selfishness and outright sins against humanity—than to be on call 24/7 on game day to make sure you catch or do not catch touchdown passes. In the broad scope of things, I do not really cares who wins the games you play to delude people from true purpose in life.

The next time you catch a touchdown pass congratulate yourself. If you drop another pass blame yourself.

Take care,


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